It’s been just under a year since I’ve posted. At least six months since I’ve shared on Instagram. I can’t even think what all we went through in 2019 and I’ve chosen to consciously set them on a shelf in my memory bank and embrace 2020 with clear eyes and full hearts.
I am going to start posting my journal entries- I voraciously write with reckless abandon without computer glitches, spotty internet, and constant charging. I always have it with me. I write for no eyes but mine, but I have been feeling compelled to share our story more deeply and vulnerable than I could have ever imagined all those years ago when I started. Marley changed my perspective of my own writing capabilities. I am constantly thinking of the long term parenting choices I make for her- if I yell at her here or there will it make her introverted and constantly guess herself. If I push her out of her comfort zone will I make her hard and loose the softness of embracing the uncomfortable situations and pushing past it. Am I screwing it all up and she doesn't ever know how much she offers the world around her? I am extreme in my thoughts. I embraced the difficulties we endured and didn't try to push through in 2019. I succumbed. With a new year, a new and first 2020 I have rallied and came through it. I think I breathed the deepest breathe and with it left all the heartache and in came strength. And faith. With that, I am feeling that perhaps someone out there needs to hear our story as well and the real dirt; the real depressing and the real amazing. So, with that, welcome to 2020 and the upgraded MarleyMakesSix.
For this year I have decided to embrace some words to guide me. Words to keep in the foreground so as to not get lost. Directions in to a new decade. Faith and Grace. Faith- to let this be what it is to be and to share without fear and Grace- to humbly accept the path that it leads to with all the ups and all the downs, all the wins and all my down right failures. It is time.
I am going to start posting my journal entries- I voraciously write with reckless abandon without computer glitches, spotty internet, and constant charging. I always have it with me. I write for no eyes but mine, but I have been feeling compelled to share our story more deeply and vulnerable than I could have ever imagined all those years ago when I started. Marley changed my perspective of my own writing capabilities. I am constantly thinking of the long term parenting choices I make for her- if I yell at her here or there will it make her introverted and constantly guess herself. If I push her out of her comfort zone will I make her hard and loose the softness of embracing the uncomfortable situations and pushing past it. Am I screwing it all up and she doesn't ever know how much she offers the world around her? I am extreme in my thoughts. I embraced the difficulties we endured and didn't try to push through in 2019. I succumbed. With a new year, a new and first 2020 I have rallied and came through it. I think I breathed the deepest breathe and with it left all the heartache and in came strength. And faith. With that, I am feeling that perhaps someone out there needs to hear our story as well and the real dirt; the real depressing and the real amazing. So, with that, welcome to 2020 and the upgraded MarleyMakesSix.
For this year I have decided to embrace some words to guide me. Words to keep in the foreground so as to not get lost. Directions in to a new decade. Faith and Grace. Faith- to let this be what it is to be and to share without fear and Grace- to humbly accept the path that it leads to with all the ups and all the downs, all the wins and all my down right failures. It is time.
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